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Marriage Articles Making It Through Your First Year of Marriage
Marriage Articles Making It Through Your First Year of Marriage
Making It Through Your First Year of Marriage
Tuesday, 01 January 2008 08:48 | 
Written by Anna Gibson-Farringer |
Now that I�ve been married a year, I look back and reflect how we made it this far already. For those who are looking to get married or are newlyweds, I�ll let you know how we got here.
Throw out any ideas you may have about marriage. They�ll never measure up. Many go into it with the idea that they will be happy all the time, there will be endless sex, romance, and everything will be as it was when they were dating.
Let me burst your bubble. It doesn�t work that way. After we got home from our honeymoon, I was in for a rude awakening. My husband leaves his things all over the floor, snores until the neighbors pound on the walls for him to shut up, never does anything around the house unless instructed how to do it, and forgot how to cook. In his defense, I wasn�t was he bargained for either. I annoy him constantly with all my quirky little habits and watch way too many cooking shows for his liking.
Another thing I learned is compromise. I can�t always have my way even though I love to do so. Anytime we discuss any big event, we have to take the other�s considerations in before making a decision. This even affects small decisions like what pizza are we going to order that night or what movie do we plan to see.
I also learned that in marriage, patience is not just a virtue, it�s required. It doesn�t matter how many times I remind my husband to take out the trash or do an errand for me, he does it when he wants to.
Being that my husband works a split shift at his job and is gone much of the time, I have learned to develop my own interests outside of our marriage. Besides working at home as a writer/researcher full-time, I�ve taken up cooking, spending time with friends, reading, and developing an exercise routine.
I�ve also learned that no problem cannot be solved without communication. When we are faced with a problem, no matter how big or small, we sit down and hash it out until we have figured out a solution.
Another thing that is good in a relationship in the first year is to keep the excitement alive. Go on vacations, road trips, schedule a weekend at a hotel and get away just the two of you. My husband and I try to plan two trips a year, a small getaway in the fall and a longer summer vacation.
That first year of marriage can be challenging, but it�s a wonderful growing experience and I wouldn�t change a thing.
Throw out any ideas you may have about marriage. They�ll never measure up. Many go into it with the idea that they will be happy all the time, there will be endless sex, romance, and everything will be as it was when they were dating.
Let me burst your bubble. It doesn�t work that way. After we got home from our honeymoon, I was in for a rude awakening. My husband leaves his things all over the floor, snores until the neighbors pound on the walls for him to shut up, never does anything around the house unless instructed how to do it, and forgot how to cook. In his defense, I wasn�t was he bargained for either. I annoy him constantly with all my quirky little habits and watch way too many cooking shows for his liking.
Another thing I learned is compromise. I can�t always have my way even though I love to do so. Anytime we discuss any big event, we have to take the other�s considerations in before making a decision. This even affects small decisions like what pizza are we going to order that night or what movie do we plan to see.
I also learned that in marriage, patience is not just a virtue, it�s required. It doesn�t matter how many times I remind my husband to take out the trash or do an errand for me, he does it when he wants to.
Being that my husband works a split shift at his job and is gone much of the time, I have learned to develop my own interests outside of our marriage. Besides working at home as a writer/researcher full-time, I�ve taken up cooking, spending time with friends, reading, and developing an exercise routine.
I�ve also learned that no problem cannot be solved without communication. When we are faced with a problem, no matter how big or small, we sit down and hash it out until we have figured out a solution.
Another thing that is good in a relationship in the first year is to keep the excitement alive. Go on vacations, road trips, schedule a weekend at a hotel and get away just the two of you. My husband and I try to plan two trips a year, a small getaway in the fall and a longer summer vacation.
That first year of marriage can be challenging, but it�s a wonderful growing experience and I wouldn�t change a thing.
