"A successful marriage requires falling in love many times, always with the same person." -Mignon McLaughlin

Happy New Years! I pray that you and your spouse are expecting great things for your marriage and family for 2008. The January issue of the Marriage 101 Newsletter is focused on prayer and planning. These are two important areas that couples should make a top priority in laying the foundation for a successful year! In the months ahead, we will continue the Marriage 101 Newsletters being centered around specific themes. This is just one of many exciting improvements that we are looking forward to implementing for our readers to ensure that you are getting all of the tools necessary to have a successful and fulfilling marriage this year and many years to come! I am looking forward to hearing wonderful things for you!

Happy New Year!

New Year's is an exciting time, isn't it? I love the feeling of putting the past behind me and looking forward to what the future holds. It's so nice to be able to start over with a clean slate!

If you are anything like me (and every other human being I know), you have some plans for this New Year. Maybe you want to lose a few pounds, or maybe you are looking for a new job. Maybe you are vowing not to fight with your spouse as much. Whatever it is, there is one thing that almost all New Year's resolutions have in common-they are made to be broken.

We all know it's true! But did you ever wonder why? Maybe it's because we are spending too much time planning our own lives. Have you ever taken the time to seek and understand God's will for your life? Sure, you know what you want out of this New Year, and out of life as a whole, but what about what He wants? Whose plan do you think is more important?

You may be one of those people who is very goal-oriented. You may have a five- or ten-year plan. It may not really matter to you if the Lord is not a part of that plan. If He is, that's great! If not, then it may not bother you all that much.

Want Real Success?

If it's the latter, I suggest you go back to the drawing board. It is only when are lives are aligned with Christ that we have any chance of finding real success.

So often, we forget that, ultimately, we are not in control of our lives. We may think we are, but it's an illusion. God is in control. It is only when we let go of our own wants and embrace what the Lord wants for us that we find what our lives should be. In Matthew 16:25 Jesus says, "For whosoever will save his life shall lose it: and whosoever will lose his life for my sake shall find it."

If you look back over the past year and don't see good changes in your marriage, career, and life, then the wrong person has been at the wheel. For example, if you wanted to lose weight or have a better relationship with your spouse and did not accomplish it, maybe it was because you were trying to do it in your own strength. It was your plan and you didn't seek God or pray to God concerning it. In your own strength, YOU WILL FAIL. It is not by your might or your power, but by God's Spirit that you will accomplish what you want.

Who are we to think that we know what's best for ourselves? Our Lord has a perfect plan for each and every one of us. He stated, "For I know the thoughts and plans that I have for you - thoughts and plans for welfare and peace and not for evil, to give you hope in your final outcome" (Jeremiah 29:11).

Let's find our true destinies concerning our marriages, families, careers, and lives in Christ for 2008. We just have to take the time and ask Him what that plan is, and then pursue it.

The bible tells us that wisdom is the principal thing; therefore get wisdom: and with all your getting get understanding (Proverbs 4:7). You get wisdom through God's word and prayer. The following will help you to get started:

1. Dedicate time to prayer

You would be amazed at just how many people I talk to that admit to not praying everyday. Your relationship with the Lord is just like any other relationship in your life; it will suffer if you ignore it. You can't just reach out one time and expect that to cover you for the rest of your life. You have to work at it. The great part is that no matter how long its been, the Lord is always there; all you have to do is reach out.

How do I pray? Basically you are simply talking to God just like you would talk to your very best friend. The purpose is to build your relationship with God. You will not hear with your ears but God will speak through His word, to your heart and mind with a gentle tug. Read the Bible during your prayer time as a tool to get truth.

Set aside time each and everyday to spend in prayer. I suggest that everyone try to do this at least once a day for about 15 minutes. I say in the morning because we should first seek God to direct our day which will allow Him to be a part of your day. There is no better way to start your day than with the Lord, but really any time will do. The important thing is to just make the time! No one is too busy and there is no part of your day that is more important.

2. Sincerity of Heart

This is where fasting may help to hear God's voice. When you combine true prayer with fasting, amazing things can happen. "So we fasted and petitioned our God about this, and he answered our prayer, Ezra 8:23" Christians need to remember that they have some very powerful tools in their arsenal, prayer and fasting. Don't be afraid of them. You can use these tools to help you find your way.

When you open your heart to the Lord be sincere about it. Don't just throw out requests left and right or it becomes less meaningful. You need to decide what is truly important to you and then pray for it. Fast, pray, give thanks and let it come from your heart. And remember, the whole idea here is to find out what God wants for you, not more of what you want for yourself!

3. Be Open to Hear and Do

Now that you have made the time and petitioned the Lord, you have to stay open to hear from him. Remember, this whole process is all about finding out the Lord's plan for you. When your answer comes, it might not be the one that you were expecting, so you have to be open to change. You may want to leave your spouse this year or move to a certain area but God is telling you to stay with your spouse or not to move to that area you wanted but one you don't want to. That's when you want to continue in prayer to find God's purpose. Trust in the Lord and His wisdom and do whatever He tells you to do.

Don't forget to give thanks at the end of the day for the blessings in your life. Each and every one of us is blessed in so many ways. It is so easy to get caught up and focus on those things that are stopping us from moving forward but remember the good things and focus on them. Do you want a successful and prosperous 2008? If so, commit your way to the Lord; trust in Him and He will do it (Psalms 37:5).

Copyright 2007 by Jewell Powell, www.marriage101.us>www.marriage101.us

The 2008 Challenge

Now that we have looked at what makes a real New Year's resolution, here's the challenge. Find five (5) scriptures that define what you would like for your marriage and family this year. Once you have them, write down your vision for 2008 and incorporate those scriptures.

When you are finished, pray over it and give the control back to God. Continue to ask for guidance, wisdom to know His will, and for the strength, courage, and determination to see it through. Be open, be flexible, and be ready for the answers you receive.

I hope you've enjoyed the January issue of the Marriage 101 Newsletter. Please visit the Marriage 101 website @ www.marriage101.us>www.marriage101.us and send me an email letting me know what topics you would like to hear in upcoming issues.

Peace & Love

by Jewell R. Powell, The Marriage Coach and author of Marriage 101: Building a Life Together by Faith. Visit us at www.marriage101.us